In two days two people I know have had their cars broken into and had things stolen, not to mention my long board was jacked. Within the last week I found out a very good friend smoked crack. And just yesterday I found out a brother in Christ who I saw on and off for a few months has been arrested. Someone from my small group who just left the country to volunteer in South Africa for 'medical missions' just sent an email of hardships in his isolation. When everyone around you stops talking about school and actually have real problems is when you know you are old.
These things along with as I look through my older pictures I have come to a conclusion. I have aged. The slight changes to my face that has looked the same since my pre-pubescent joys of life, the new moles, and change in body shape have all pointed to this as well. I am now what would be considered an adult in shape...The reality of this year's hardships haven't left me where I was a year ago, either...The pressure of being a Godly man which I have long feared to hold the burden of is now beginning to be forced on me, and there is a strong fear. An unbiblical fear that doesn't deserve a place in me or anyone else.
