ywam 1

I am usually one of the haters. But whether because of age or the staff of YWAM being cool, I really appreciate them, particularly the ones that teach.

Cathy was teaching us for a few days on Evangelism. She probably spends at least 10 hours a week evangelizing talking to and meeting strangers. Her heart for the lost was so inspiring. She had a Power Point presentation and talking about her sisters... and I thought she was just sharing her life with us...But as the story went on, it was about her visiting her sisters at Taipei 101, one of the kids went missing. And how they searched and searched from each floor...and then finally found him.

Then she was like, do you think our Family would've been the same if we lost him?

If we could continue to have a good time in the future?

--At first I was like...this a trick question? Then she surprised us(me) all when she was like,

No. Like when the shepherd loses his sheep, he will leave the 99 others and rejoices even more when he finds the lost one. That's what Evangelism is. We are finding our family. And she was just crying as she said these things...

Then as my Principal went up to close, her voice wavered heavily as she finished crying... Then they played a video, Thank God...cause I was about to lose it, as well.

That's when it hit me. For many of these brothers and sisters in Christ, they are the first believers in their family. And they take on a great burden with Jesus, I often am too even scared to look at...their own blood family.

généreux

Recently and often I hear statistics quoted about America that really makes me wonder.

Family sizes have shrank by 50%, but houses have increased in size by 40%. The world actually has enough food to provide all the people living on it...but many die each day from starvation. It'd only take 10 billion dollars so that clean water is easily accessible...yet Americans spent more than 450 billion on Christmas this past winter.

Lately, I've been having a humanitarian/philanthropy phase. I think about how God would think of America as a whole and me individually. As children we have all the best toys and clothes. Yet our brothers, in Africa, India, and China have the best broken glass bottles and burning tires. When we hoard most of the wealth in the world, how will he hold us accountable for what we do or don't do...

Thinking about this has kind of made me despise myself and others... and reminds me of good works, legalism, pride, and what I can do, what I can bring...When it should be how does God feel about this; how does God want me to respond...

I find myself trying not to judge others with what God has blessed them with. When I see people spending a lot of money on things I don't feel particular important it's easy for me to think they have committed a heinous crime. I think of them as people who would go on vacation and harpoon dolphins with giant rusty pitch sporks. Or people who pariticipate in the competitive eating of puppies and kittens. Or those who dislike the grilled stuffed burrito.

It's not about how much we give, but how we worship Jesus through our giving and praying. How we give until we are satisfied, whether it sacrifices much or little of us. A giving not just out of obedience but of joy and contentment.

fierté

Chronological snobbery a term coined by C.S. Lewis, is describing the erroneous argument that the thinking, art, or science of an earlier time is inherently inferior when compared to that of the present.

Something which I never understood... When you look back at the Romans, and Mayans... They probably did more with what they had, than we do today with what we have. The Romans and Mayans even had indoor plumbing when today, there are some places that don't even know what that is. So, how is it that people today think that those of old are people that enjoy to roll in their own feces and wear helmets? Just because we improve on the comfortableness of life, with bidets?

And that's when it occurred to me. The moment during my hot shower where it felt a bit cold and my hair stood up. Why is chronological snobbery so prolific today? The first sin, ever committed, pride. If angelic beings fell prey to sin, how much more likely are we to be eaten alive by it.

In today's society, which I am just as much a part of and guilty with... We have fallen into an illusion of our own abilities and knowledge. We hide behind our innovations and engineered marvels of comfort and security. It has puffed us up with knowledge and fed our egos.

Beside what the Bible says on pride (1, 2, 3), there is a lot more to it. What is so powerful about it, is how it slowly creeps up on us, and then finally averts and creates in us, a fruit of destruction. We don't even know how proud we are, that's how crazy it is! When you think about why you sometimes say what you say, or do what you do, you may realize you're trying to bring glory or attention to yourself.

Or the opposite...we try so hard not to do things we see others do that exhibit folly, but inadvertently use that, to let others see the contrast from others to ourselves to make ourselves once again, look great. Or maybe how you are so quick to correct others, and be a critical Chris... I am guilty of that often.

There are so many layers, different depths and craziness to it, that C. J. Mahaney continually calls himself in his book, Humility,...

" a proud man pursuing humility by the grace of God. I don’t write as an authority on humility; I write as a fellow pilgrim walking with you on the path set for us by our humble Savior. "

The way we respond to situations and people, becomes different and endangered when our hearts are hardened and necks are stiff. Above all, the greatest damage it does is prevent us from repenting. One of the greatest things Jesus pursues in us, a repentant heart.

au-delà

After many late nights in the shower as I was debriefing myself and letting my mind wander with God, I wondered. Why do people think it's so crazy to believe in the Bible, literally. One specific instance, such as the Giant Humans (Goliath and his brothers). When you look at the world..

1. Dogs, to Wolves...
2. Cats, to Cougars/Jaguars/etc...
3. Dik-diks, to Deers...
4. Guinea Pigs to Capybaras...
5. Snakes to Anacondas
6. Dolphins to Whales

and probably tons of others that I'm ignorant about. Is it that far of a stretch that there could've once been Giants, with possibly one brown eye? Often those giant races were commissioned by the Jews to utter destruction... After they killed the entire population they'd burn everything they owned, all of their livestock(sometimes) and bodies. Is it so shocking that 3,500 years later we can't find much hard evidence on Giants? We don't even know what happened at Roanoke, almost 410 years ago!

There are people that even refute the Holocaust, now... only about 70 years later from when it happened...imagine how many people would refute it 3,500 years from now...

Love is a chance we should take

In the midst of a shower, where all my deepest thinking seems to be done, I came upon a revelation. Because of this revelation, I realized why there has definitely been hinderance or hurt in a lot of my relationships. While not innately a sin, it however remains a bit...backwards.

Instead of continually beating around the bush with a teasing behavior, like a dessert shared between 8 females and everyone continually takes a small piece until the end and no one takes the last bite, I shall just say it! I realize as I look back in a retrospective lens, sharing my personal life is relatively easy. Why? 'Cause I don't give a *boop*. Truth is truth, and all will be brought into the light, right? At least that's how my subconscious processes it... However. I have found it more difficult, that my struggle is not in being transparent with how I feel or what's been going on in my life but in being, me.

When I am not me, that is usually because I am uncomfortable with something and probably has a root or stem in the fear of man. Which is unusual for me, in my opinion.., because I am not one to back down from conflict or confrontation. A good storm always precedes a good harvest, right? Anyways. Like a child with people I feel like I don't know or am new to, I slowly test the waters to see if it's safe to let my walls down...more and more until they are gone.

An old lesson that had a deeper layer and meaning. People always want authenticity, demand it, and when it's not good enough they are frustrated or disappointed. That's when it clicked for me. No one wants to lower the walls/gate first to get punched first. No one wants to be the first to step out there. Especially me. But... Lately it has really donned on me the gravity and desperation of my desire for knowing my identity in Christ. And to chase and pursue that has slowly but Shirley given me a sense of freedom.

I hate, yet love, when my experience matches my knowledge. I have heard it before, but I feel more so its truth now. That, you can only truly love people when you know God loves you and you love God. You no longer care for their approval and are free to be you and in that are not bound looking for their respect and you will no longer use them for their affections. It makes me want to put myself out there even more(with discernment of course), and tell all the sissies to bring it, and give me the hardest punch they think they can deliver. (starts at :47.)

What makes me worth anything more than a grilled stuffed burrito is Jesus's death on the cross. It's the ultimate symbol and act of his love. So, what that means to me is knowing all my eggs are in my God's basket, I am free to love on as many people as I can. I love others because God loves me. And it doesn't matter how others respond as long as I am honoring God and loving on them.

God wants us to be the first ones to step out. You never know how broken other people are until you get to know them. And to be able to reach out to them and risk getting punched again and again, is what love is all about. Love came to show us the way.

rebelles

I was born a rebel long before I knew what that word meant.

You and your friends like something? I will be against it!

POKéMON?

I tried it, hated it.

FML.com?

A place where everyone can complain and grumble together and laugh at each other's miseries? That's soOo dumb. Some are funny, I won't deny it, but the concept in general...seriously?

Sports?

Only sport I like is--kidding, there are none that I do, except for world league matches/games.

I think my intense need for rebellion was instilled in me very early on. Part of me wants to take no responsibility and take it to the next level by saying it was because when I was conceived, I had to fight over a million other versions of myself to have the right to live. How is that rebellion? I guess it really isn't...It's just me liking to fight. Well, I showed those motha suckas what was up, and so did you, congratulations!

Anyways... As I continue to look around I notice more and more people rebelling. Our country, was founded on rebelling when we gave Great Britain the Great Finger. We love to stick it to 'the man', and fight the good fight. Stories of one man, turning the tide against tyranny, metaphorically and hopefully never physically, turns us on. That's why super heroes are AWESOME. It's also why people can get away with rebooting a super hero movie franchise less than 5 years old(Hulk, Spiderman) and no one will give a damn.

But when I look around, all I see is rebellion. I will no longer be that lone man standing against tyranny. How can I rebel when everyone rebels with me?! That's not fun. When I first came to church many years ago, I brought my critical Chris attitude into it, as well. I wanted to rebel. And the church made it easy, incredibly easy. Church people were a disappointment, the spiritual authority and doctrines were laughable to me. I felt justified. But as I grew and grow, I saw this often in the church among others that were dissatisfied. This dissatisfaction with the shortcomings of who we thought God called them to be, spawned a cesspool of haters.

Everyone walks around like the Church is a great whore instead of the great bride. I'm sympathetic to non-Christians when they hate on the church even though sometimes they may not really deserve it. But when 'Christians' begin to rip on the church and avoid it like a neglected girlfriend, I feel a new found fury! It makes me feel... rebellious. How do I be a rebel in a world of rebellion? I pondered on this for about an hour, and by hour I probably meant twenty seconds. EASY, I thought.

Logic states, the enemy of my enemy is my friend. Well, that means it's time to stop rebelling, brosephus. It's soOo easy to hate on the Church and its short comings and how people have 'let us down'. But it's having the understanding to look at it and understand that we are all part of that 'messed up' church. We are just as messed up as the person we dislike, and hate on. We are in need of that grace just as much as that spiritual noob. And we are no smarter, better than anyone else.

It's having the compassion, to get dirty while helping. It's having the humility to be under spiritual authority. It's having that love for something broken that God loves and pleads with us to love.

It's knowing that we are that bride, that bride that Jesus Christ died for and loves.

cuire

Dad: So, I've noticed you've been helping your mom cook.

George: Yeah, I thought it was about time I started t--

Mom: He's just hungry, that's why he helps. Notice he never helps before 12:30, or 6:30.

George: ... I also thought* I'd make things easier for y--

Mom: And he likes to cut things up...

Dad: oOoh.

George: ...Why do we have to eat so late? T_T