After recently finishing Lord of the Rings it has gotten me on an elf-mania. I started to look up stuff from the Silmarillion and wikipedia and searched for answers that would give me a better understanding of LOTR. I was also then inspired to download almost every good Lord of the Rings game and beat them. After that I started looking for more games with elves to play and beat those too. Hell yeah, nerding it up.
Elves became most popular because of J. R. R. Tolkien and his attention to detail. Their popularity must have been a huge hit when the books came out. And over the generations it slowly died out and was something that you can't relate to as easily. But things like WoW bring them back. The ever-youthful, clear skinned, agile, asian dressing white people with their song like words with English accents are irresistible. This was all until WoW brought in the blood elves, and they now look Asian... if you choose it to black or brown hair...kind of. I remember when the first movie came out, my English teacher in high school busted a nut over Orlando Bloom. This was a lady that always giggled about Shakespeare's metaphors for the penis. She would often go on for half the period about the naughtiness of 'swords' and what not. Often when I left that class I would remain calm until I stepped outside, collapse then proceed to shudder violently from disgust. I would often bring a pillow cause I shook so violently I'd bang my head on the ground a lot.
Then I realized something after watching Underworld: Rise of the Lycans. Sidenote: If you did not see any of the previous films there will be many things you don't understand. Vampires are the new elves, but derrty. They are the ever youthful, clear skinned, agile, 'fair' creatures that do it a lot. Angel, Spike, Edward Cullen, Dracula, Selene, and Sonja are all examples of the new promiscuous and slutty elves that do it in the derrty dark. Because vampires are immortal and generally set in a more similar world to ours it's easier to be able to bring them into our world as opposed to elves. If need be it's also easier to do flashbacks or just change the time settings to something more medieval. And because of that they are easier to relate to.
Gone are the days when vampires would scare you and make you barf on site. Well...not completely.
Elves in modern day?! Singing songs and shooting arrows does not sound as appealing as they do when they are in a fantasy. The only time I've seen this done well is in Hell Boy 2, and Luke Gross does not sing in it.
This is without going deeper into the more hardcore D&D realms where there's a million other elf races/sub-races. But I would briefly mention Drow Elves are like vampires! Except their allergy to sunlight is less harsh, they don't have to feed and are usually evil?
Friday, February 13, 2009
Heure
As I have previously said, I like to read random articles. And being so ADD I love to day dream, and in these dreams I make loose connections. Connections to the Bible, or to my daily life, or both are commonly made.
In boredom I occasionally visit NPR.org for news. And I found something interesting lately. There was once a snake that was three feet wide, and one ton heavy. It also presumably ate crocodiles whole. Scientists think for it to be able to have survived it had to be in a very warm/hot tropical place with an average of 90 degrees. But enough with the snake! What I was thinking was... Maybe Adam and Eve were not tricked so much as coerced. I always thought it was a dinky little garden snake with hypnotic eyes. But once you broke out of it you'd pick it up, wind it up like a sling and smash its brains on some trees.
But no! What if, it was a 42 foot long 1 ton heavy 3 feet wide titanoboa, telling Eve, "BI*boop* you better eat that apple." According to the article as the world grows warmer one day tropical climates would be able to contain such a creature... Which is hella scary, what kind of weapons would you need to fight one of those, much less an army of those.
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I once read an article about a civilization that collapsed due to disease. As interesting as it was, it was nothing compared to the comments under it. Disease brought to the Americas have wiped out entire nations. Like most diseases, they come from animals. And while Native Americans and other cultural people lived in the wild there was a distinctive difference in their life styles. They did not have domesticated animals like the Europeans or have such close living quarters with them.
Which brought me to pigs. Pigs in the Bible are considered unclean and for the longest time it weirded me out. Jews too good for bacon?! Pigs carry so many diseases that are transferrable to us. It may also be because we have similar body parts(ie heart/skin tranplants). They also carry a lot of worms.
While Babe and Charlotte's Web has fooled the nation; their intelligence and charm does not fool me! These fat ugly animal's cousin, the feral pig, is one of the 100 most invasive species. Not to mention their subsistence diet means they could eat anything. This is including people, and after that they'd go rabid and become zombie pigs.
In boredom I occasionally visit NPR.org for news. And I found something interesting lately. There was once a snake that was three feet wide, and one ton heavy. It also presumably ate crocodiles whole. Scientists think for it to be able to have survived it had to be in a very warm/hot tropical place with an average of 90 degrees. But enough with the snake! What I was thinking was... Maybe Adam and Eve were not tricked so much as coerced. I always thought it was a dinky little garden snake with hypnotic eyes. But once you broke out of it you'd pick it up, wind it up like a sling and smash its brains on some trees.
But no! What if, it was a 42 foot long 1 ton heavy 3 feet wide titanoboa, telling Eve, "BI*boop* you better eat that apple." According to the article as the world grows warmer one day tropical climates would be able to contain such a creature... Which is hella scary, what kind of weapons would you need to fight one of those, much less an army of those.
---
I once read an article about a civilization that collapsed due to disease. As interesting as it was, it was nothing compared to the comments under it. Disease brought to the Americas have wiped out entire nations. Like most diseases, they come from animals. And while Native Americans and other cultural people lived in the wild there was a distinctive difference in their life styles. They did not have domesticated animals like the Europeans or have such close living quarters with them.
Which brought me to pigs. Pigs in the Bible are considered unclean and for the longest time it weirded me out. Jews too good for bacon?! Pigs carry so many diseases that are transferrable to us. It may also be because we have similar body parts(ie heart/skin tranplants). They also carry a lot of worms.
While Babe and Charlotte's Web has fooled the nation; their intelligence and charm does not fool me! These fat ugly animal's cousin, the feral pig, is one of the 100 most invasive species. Not to mention their subsistence diet means they could eat anything. This is including people, and after that they'd go rabid and become zombie pigs.
Sunday, February 1, 2009
Être gai?
Mom: Hey George, come watch this on TV... This boy here was playing games for hours, he wasn't feeling well but continued to play...O_o
George: And then he died, right?
Mom: Yeah...
George: I bet he was Chinese or Korean, right..?
Mom: Yeah. How'd you know?
George: Chinese and Koreans always do that kind of shiet.
Mom: What about Americans?
George: Americans value their qualities of life too much. They're also fickle and hedonistic.
Mom: Which one are you then?
George: Mostly the American...
Mom: Well don't be following all those Americans... doing this and that.
George: Don't worry I wouldn't do anything to myself...
Mom: Don't be doing that...geh stuff either.
George: What?
Mom: You know, 同性戀, gay. Don't be gay.
Few hours later.
George: Do you really think I'm gay?
Mom: LOL No... I just worry about you...
George: About what...
Mom: I don't know. I just think you'll get tricked into doing gay stuff...
That's as close as the translations get. I don't even know what to say. I don't even know what that means. My mom used to warn me everyday as a Freshman in college. She thought I was promiscuous and told me not to touch women that did not 'belong' to me.
And now for some reason she thinks I'm gay.
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